Get the aluminum pole out of the crawl space (very high strength to weight ratio … and it requires no decoration).

I find tinsel distracting.”

It’s time for the airing of grievances. Then the feats of strength.

I got a lot of problems with you people.”

It’s Festivus for the rest of us, Dec. 23.

Kruger, you couldn’t smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot date with a babe … I lost my train of thought.”

So gather up Denim Vest, H&H Bagels, the Two-Face and the guys from OTB.

You must meet a lot of men. You know who’s a man? Charlie here. He’s a man. You know who else is a man? Me. I’m a man.”

“I’m a man.”

Have an Atomic Sub. Try a raisin bagel. Put a sawbuck on Captain Nemo in the fifth. Enjoy a soup with a rubber band in it (“Paco!”) …

Kruger, my son says your company stinks.”

Meanwhile, on the lockout front, apparently Bill Daly and Don Fehr spoke yesterday, and speculation is that there might actually be meetings in the days after Christmas. Freakin’ idiots.

Maybe it will lead to a settlement. That would be another Festivus miracle!

Until you pin me, Festivus is not over.”