John Tortorella post-morning skate presser


From the NHL (LOL):

An Interview with:


Q. The guys you brought up, how do you use them, not in the series,

but what is the thought behind having them up here?

COACH TORTORELLA:  Just have players ready to play in case we run

into injuries.

Q.  What has been the key do you think of your strong recent third


COACH TORTORELLA:  Staying with it.

Q.  Being aggressive?

COACH TORTORELLA:  Staying with it.

Q.  John, if you’ve got a guy who is not going offensively that you

know can.  What has historically been your tactic?  Do you talk to him?  Do

you just ride it out?

COACH TORTORELLA:  Depends on the player.  Depends on the player,

depends on the situation.  It’s a question that I can’t answer because it

all depends on the situation.

Q.  So if I asked you about Ryan Callahan?

COACH TORTORELLA:  I won’t answer.

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  1. Good question, Carp. I sure don’t have the time (nor the talent, for that matter).

  2. Doodie Machetto, Get well Tony and Miami Pimp on

    Classic Torts. Who was the Callahan questioner?

  3. Boy, is it that time of the month for Torts? He’s certainly getting REAL testy!!

  4. Carp – Two questions:

    1. When does Torts start wearing Bill Belichek’s hoodie behind the bench?

    2. When they make the movie version of the 2011-12 Rangers, does Henry Winkler play Torts?

  5. Doodie Machetto, Get well Tony and Miami Pimp on

    Carp, I thought Torts was was better with the media during the regular season. But now during the playoffs I’m glad he doesn’t say anything because then you’ll have an asshat like Brooks take whatever he says and crucify him for it. Now all Brooks can say is “he won’t answer my questions!” and Brooks just comes off as a whiny baby.

  6. He’s good sometimes, and we all know when he’s not going to be good … the day after he answers a whole bunch of questions he’s not going to answer a whole bunch more, especially when he dealt with idiotic questions and phones ringing and microphone’s not working after the game the other night. In the right circumstances he does answer questions very patiently and very well, like the day before the series started.

    and we know what kind of questions he won’t answer, but idiots keep asking them. Like he’s going to tell us what he says to Ryan Callahan about Callahan struggling.

  7. I have some questions:

    Where is bybytorts?


    Do these people still root for the Rangers?

  8. and he doesn’t like questions from people he’s seeing for the first time all year … or from the same morons who come in once in a while with the same stupid-type of question.

  9. Someone should ask Torts at the next presser whether or not he has seen the parody of his press conferences done by DJ Steve Porter. No doubt the answer will be “Next Question” or “that’s a ridiculous question . . . .next question”

  10. Carp – How badly is Callahan banged up? He clearly is not 100% – perhaps more like 60-70% – if that. At what point do you sit him or move him off the 2nd? Shouldn’t he be moved to the 3rd line if Boyle or Feds can be more productive on the 2nd line?

  11. @kausatoday@ Devils could put together a super line tonight against the Rangers.


    If you had a “super line” why wouldn’t you play them all the time?

  12. Further to the shot-blocking, defensive collapse discussion and Scotty Bowman’s points…

    It was fairly obvious that the Rangers were prepared to give the Senators and Capitals a huge amount of time and space on the points in certain situations (like being gassed and watching Hamrlik and Green play catch for three minutes). But can’t really argue with the results.

    I’d still disagree with the perception that it’s an easy way to defend. If you don’t have positional and stick discipline and a good goalie, the shot-blocking itself won’t get a team that far.

  13. ilb, can I ask u a favor?

    I cant sleep anymore, the Rangers are consuming my every thought!!

  14. So the Devs can load up and put a SUPER LINE~! out on the ice. And Girardi and McD will shut them down anyway.

    So then the other 40 minutes of the game we can dominate against their lesser players (Staal and MDZ are more than capable of shutting down whoever else is left).

  15. Ria(the silent bonehead) on

    Carp my usual game day question who are the refs for tonight?

  16. But what is the actual favor that ILB is asking from Tiki? Codewords for scooblies?

  17. What the byfug is a scooblie? Only think ilb asks of me is to not start trouble and make Carp’s life easier.

  18. Doodie Machetto, Get well Tony and Miami Pimp on

    “Shouldn’t he be moved to the 3rd line if Boyle or Feds can be more productive on the 2nd line?”

    Saul, 25% Callahan is more effective on 2nd line than 150% Fedotenko or Boyle.

  19. Blogmama Go Tony! on

    Did you all not pick up on Carp’s cameo in that video?! Krisy did!

    Hey Stranger, today it was Sal’s.

  20. True Fans Bleed RW&B on


    Usual question. How did Avery look with Redden coming off their beach vacation? I assume there was a banana hammock, appletini, and a bowtie involved. Thanks.

  21. Doodie Machetto, Get well Tony and Miami Pimp on

    SCX, Sykora-Elias-Zubrus and Ponikarovsky-Henrique-Clarkson aren’t exactly a group of slouches.

    Although, I’d probably do Henrique centering Sykora and Elias, and Zubrus centering Poni and Clarkson.

  22. *BENCH* Callahan.

    Let’s play *Wellman* in his spot. Let’s also move Gaborik to the 4th line and Richards to 6th D-Man and swap in Bickel on second line Center.

  23. Carp – That’s done by DJ Steve Porter. He actually has a bunch of great mixes for those into Electro/House, but he found a niche in doing these Sports Mixes with quotes and press-conferences. They are awesome and hilarious.

  24. True Fans Bleed RW&B on

    We’re also going to increase playing time for Eminger on the blue line, add Woywitka to make up for Bickel moving up, and rest MacD and Girardi a little bit so they aren’t completely burned out by summer vacation.

  25. Doodie Machetto, Get well Tony and Miami Pimp on

    Manny, putting Bickel there would probably help on faceoffs.

  26. Leetchhalloffame on

    Watching Cally there is no question in my mind he is playing with some kind of hand/finger injury. Just not his usual offensive threat at all.

  27. It may be bandwagon (and derivative of so many articles), but it’s still cool led with the Rangers today.

  28. I don’t want to move Cally, but I’m just asking the question that nobody is answering – is Cally in a minor slump because it’s just a minor slump or because is he injured and not effectively able to fight through it? Clearly, everybody is beat up at this point in the season – but is callahan much more beat up?

    A couple of years ago, Drury was 50% in the playoffs of what he was during the regular season (it was his one decent year) – after the playoffs ended, it turned out he was playing with a broken hand and that’s why he wasn’t effective.

  29. These are great ideas guys. Girardi stinks. He’s no good after 30 games. He’s looked worn out forever. He probably needs to rest for a week or two.

    Eminger is a must and Woywitka is a great idea.

    I would even throw Cam Talbot in goal. Biron is tired from all the rest. Hank is tried from all the band practice.

  30. From the NHL’s Game Notes: Tonight’s referees are Chris Lee (#28) and Kelly Sutherland (#11). The Linesmen are Derek Amell (#75) and Jonny Murray (#95). The standby official is Steve Kozari (#40). NHL Supervisors are Terry Gregson and Kris King.

  31. Carp – is it fair to say that you usual guys who actually know Torts and can ask him questions in a 1 on 1 setting are more likely to get answers than boneheads who ask dumb questions? I feel like you guys should get to ask questions first and then let the other idiots ask about why he calls timeouts or if Chris Kreider learned from Jerry York to take sticks away (or whatever the hell that byfuglien question was).

  32. Marji…very funny video…thanks. You’ll never get an answer from the Rangers on injuries. I assume Cally’s hand is badly bruised, or a non displaced fracture. It’s like Dubi. Not skating but starting to ride the bike. Most likely a broken foot…but they will say nothing.

  33. Its a joking favor…

    Since u said the other day the baby ilb is due in July, can u knock boots with the mrs on July 17 all day to help induce labor that day? Hahahahahahahahahahaha

  34. Lev – I don’t know about the game tonite, but I can tell you that some Shlemiel just came into my company and tried to sell me something I didn’t remotely need, so I left my feet and blasted him face first into the tiled wall of my lobby. No whistle, no Toronto review, no suspension – just good old fashioned violence. The playoffs are taking their toll on me (and the Yankees’ miserable lineup)

  35. Nothing important, or u could choose July 4, the birthday of one of the greatest men to ever live!lives

  36. Where’s mama? Is she out looking for a newspaper?

    Ria Tortilla! How YOU doin’?

    Seriously, WTB is a scooblie? Is that some Canadian thing?

  37. Lev – Shouldn’t you be scoring the talent on the beach in Tel instead of blogging with us goons?

  38. Sally, Mama is thinking about the arrival of her boyfriend soon. The boyfriend whose face i need to rearrange so i can steal her from him!! Mama will be mine!

  39. so if the Rangers win it all this year… is Avery illegible to receive the ring and have his name engraved on the Cup? Anyone?

  40. @kausatoday@ NHL sends CBA termination notice to players association.


    Let’s Go Rangers. Could be the first chance in a long time to win this Cup thing.

  41. Is adding an “i” to my screen name the new equivalent of finally breaking down and getting an I-phone and Twitter account?

  42. @CCCP@ – NO. He didn’t play in enough regular season games (34?) and he will not play in the Stanley Cup Finals, should the Rangers make it there.

  43. Shes too good for that slimeball Avery. Anyhow, i dont think i could mess his face up.

  44. “NO” said the Avery hater! :P

    what’s the minimum amount of reg. season games? and you must play in playoffs in order to get the ring? i thought it just regular season games…

  45. Though I believe a team could request for a player who didn’t play the requisite games to have his name on the Cup anyway. I’m sure Torts will nominate Avery, right?

    Also, Sykora, Elias, Zubrus, Poni, Henrique, and Clarkson all suck. Stahl and Del Zaster will chew them up and spit them out. RANGERS IN THREE.

  46. @CCCP@ Prior to 1977 only players who had completed the Stanley Cup playoffs were eligible. Today, players appearing in 41 regular-season games or one Stanley Cup Final game for the championship team have their names engraved on the Cup. The NHL makes exceptions for players who do not meet the standard because of injury or other extenuating circumstances.

  47. And the team can ask for exceptions, they max out at 52 names on the cup.

    You can thank Detroit for that since in 98 they had something crazy like 59 names (they wanted to include Konstantinov due to obvious circumstances).

  48. A player must play 41 regular season games or one FINALS game to get on the Cup.

    Teams can also petition for additional names with special circumstances (like the Red Wings did for, who was it, who was in a wheel chair after a car accident?).

  49. Yup, 41 or 1 SC final. Otherwise, the team may apply for special circumstances. NHL makes the final decision in those cases.

  50. “One shift people…lets not worry about who’s on the cup…stay focused” John Tortorella

  51. After the Kings have, as the inevitably will, win the 2012 Stanley Cup and the BIG trophy is handed to a tearful ANZE KOPITAR, do you think they’ll be playing in the Staple center a little George Harrison . . . . .”As my KOPITAR gently weeps”

    Much to my dismay . . . . . .HE CANNOT BE STOPPED.

    In the Game of Thrones, hail the new King . . .KOPITAR

  52. Wasn’t Edzo denied to engraved on SC because he didn’t meet the requirements, even though the Rangers petitioned?

  53. Carp, do you see Debour doing a McLean, and dressing the goons for tonight? I thought the 4th line matchups were interesting because when NY absorbed NJ’s best shot(pretty much all of 2nd period) the play of the NY 4th were the only breaks for Henrik that period. And if not tonight then for sure in game 3 if NY wins?

  54. If the NYRangers get incredibly lucky (aka if the Devils and Kings both roll over or forfeit), then The Kreider should be the first one to hoist Stanley.

  55. Fat Guy, ill be in Tel Aviv doing just that, but in 2 weeks from tomorrow :). for now im stuck with you goons.

  56. Man I love this blog. I think its about time I create a more memorable user name to distinguish myself from every other James. Long-time reader, and about to become a far heavier contributer. Thanks for all the great work Carp, and for all the entertainment Doodie, Miami, Tony, ilb, Yev, and whomever else I may have missed. You’ve talked me off many a ledge this season!

  57. anyone going tonite text me 516-749-3110 meet up at tracks(in penn station) or flying puck on 30th and 7th

  58. Why are we talking about whose names would be on the cup. Who gives a flying Emricks ass. Just win the damn thing, and theyre heroes and legends fforever. Good, im glad edzo didnt get his name on there, guys a disgac3

  59. Carp – is Santa Claus for real? How about the Easter Bunny? Will the economy rebound? Will my 401k be worth anything when I retire? Will it rain next Tuesday?

    I await your answers to these while I think up more questions.

  60. Thanks, SCX, I remember there was some sort of controversy surrounding him…

  61. Can anyone answer why Stan Fischler is still allowed to ask more questions than anyone at the Coaches press conferences? And Stan was the one who asked about the TO Torts used after an icing in Game 1…not some reporter who hasn’t been around the team all year…

    MSG really feels that of all people, Stan is the person to represent them in the press room?

  62. Ulfie28- perhaps you and Kopitar should get a room. Before he meets McDonagh and Lundqvist….
    If the Rangers get there, that is…..

  63. JIMMY McB

    I’m with you … this blog is awesome. It’s one of a handful of site I’ve visited EVERY SINGLE DAY for like the past 5 years.

    And the message I’ve sent out on every one of those days has been “this NYR team is complete and utter amateur-hour / bush-league / Mickey-Mouse trash”

    But no one believes me. So I’ll keep reminding you guys until you do.

  64. Edzo is on the cup…at least according to Wikipedia:

    “When the New York Rangers submitted the list of names for engraving, Ed Olczyk and Mike Hartman were included, although they fell short of the official requirements of 41 regular season games, or participation in the Final. When the Stanley Cup was engraved, Olczyk and Hartman’s names were omitted. (Olczyk had played 37 regular-season games and one game in the Eastern Conference Final. Hartman had played 35 regular-season games and none in the playoffs.) Both players had spent the entire season with New York, and missed extensive time due to injury. At the Rangers’ protest, the NHL added Olczyk and Hartman to the Cup. The NHL no longer adds missing names after the Cup has been engraved, though it allows teams to petition for the inclusion of players who do not officially qualify.”

  65. Also has anyone else felt this way…I think Pierre has gotten much less annoying this season. Perhaps it is because he doesn’t say Edzo every two second but I don’t find him as insufferable as in years past…

  66. Sally must be really happy about the length of the Rangers playoff run vis a vis the length of boneheads/boneheadette’s beards.

  67. Sally, may i use little hambone to name my next dog, since wicky and ilb have passed up the wonderful name?

  68. I think Edzo re-injured his finger during the SC finals. By opening and closing the gate to the bench too hard :-)

  69. No, McNugget is just as annoying – if not MORE annoying – than ever before.

  70. Evan: That is called the Doc Emrick effect. His screaming makes Pierre less annoying by comparison. If Pierre were paired with say…Pang(er) he would reach new found heights of annoying.

  71. “Remember the time Bobby Boucher showed up at halftime and the Mud Dogs won the Bourbon Bowl do ya?”

  72. So based on Evan’s post, Avery would be a lock for a Torts petition, right?

  73. Manny…LOL.

    I know he has his haters here (alliteration!) but I love Doc. I think he conveys the excitement of a game intelligently and better than anyone else, though I have noticed that he’s gotten more names/numbers wrong this season than ever before.

  74. I find Engblom to be far more offensive. Half the stuff that comes out of his mouth is complete drivel and nonsense.

  75. Jimmy & Tiki’s dog can BOTH be LITTLE HAMBONE.

    Manny, I’ve been getting amazing beard updates all along. I’m psyched! How’s yours coming along?

  76. Yay Sally! Welcome Jimmy! You can have whatever u want here, as long as u dislike Boston! Thats the requirement of posting :)

  77. Evan – I disagree. I think Emrick tries to create excitement in the game that isn’t there. Screaming SAVE!!!!! on a routine stop by the goalie isn’t what I call conveying the excitement of the game.

  78. My beard is unkept. My boss asked me to run to Court today actually. Pretty, pretty funny. No offense to anyone but my Co-Worker (who is Catholic) thinks I look like Jesus.

  79. I miss Sam and Joe. Doc’s voice gets on my last nerve, and I routinely hope Pierre gets hit between the eyes while doing his between the the benches segment.

    No worries Tiki, Boston hatrid has been ingrained in me since childhood.

  80. Manny, many years ago, I grew an unkempt beard for the whole baseball season, never trimmed it. Was told by many that I looked like a terrorist.

  81. D’Rita D’Avanzo of Mob Wives has declared via Facebook that she *is* going to the Rangers game tonight.

    Thank God.

  82. I was on some site and some Philly fans were whining how the Rangers basically play with 6 goalies blah blah blah… then some guy commented Why dont the Flyers try playing with at least 1 goalie for now. That gave me a good chuckle.

  83. Ooooo! Tiki has a new BFF!

    Manny, that’s awesome. I realized last week that I accidentally grew a mullet, but I’m waaay to superstitious to cut that nasty rat’s nest off my skull.

  84. Cross Check,

    I think Doc can be guilty of exactly what you describe but I don’t think that diminishes the overall quality of his broadcasts. If anything, at least its about the play and him not bending over backwards to find something positive to say about the home team like Sam and Joe…not sure if I’m about to get branded as a heretic…

  85. Perhaps its just Joe’s influence on Sam but I find Sam to have become more of a homer since JD left…

  86. Sam = Rocks yeah he’s a little bit homer but who isnt. Listen to half the guys around the league. he by far is better than most.

    Doc = Class guy and I know from personal experience

  87. 4 hrs ladies and gents…but I have a feeling once I get out of work the time will just flyyy by

  88. Dore 33,

    I think that’s fair about Sam and I agree he’s probably better than most. Personal favorite is Jim Hughson on CBC.

    How do you think Joe compares to the rest of the league’s color guys?

  89. ilb,
    Thanks for the suggestion. Up to now we’ve only used a car.
    I hope you are right about 1) US (da ranger getting to da SC) and 2) KOPITAR can be stopped (contained might be better) by someone(s).
    The problem then exists what do you do with (Keith) Richards? I’m sure he loves the big guy taking the heat and it’s probably opened up his opportunities as a number 2. This is less of a problem since it’s be shown that Richards can be distracted, but now you have got to handle BOTH of them. I mean we have the Big-Time D men, but it appears they have so many guys going now we might be overwhelmed.
    Sorry to be looking ahead but I am just so bored with this match-up, or maybe I am in love.

    Hopefully time will tell and they’ll all wind up walking (riding) together in the Canyon of Heroes come June

  90. IF it winds up being Rangers vs Kings in the finals. I don’t think its a free pass to the Cup for the kings like some ppl have been saying. Playoffs are very much about matchups, and the kings defensive game outmatches everyone in the west. Mike smith carried the Coyotes this far and now is crumbling. So thats why kings appear to be so good. If you watch thier game. Its not much different from the 3 teams we have played so far.

    As far as the kings size as well. Ovechkin and company would physically match up with any team in the NHL. besides semin as we all know.

  91. Sally, I’m going to ask him, in order, if Avery’s name will be on the Cup, if a sabre really is a baby buffalo, why he only has one assistant coach, why he calls timeout after icings, and what’s his favorite mustard. But only if they lose.

    welcome, McB. Post early and often. It’s free.

    As for rings, the team can make as many as it wants. So, truly, Avery could get one. Especially since Glen loves him.

  92. Sally, also, if there’s any update on Dubinsky. And what he thinks of the LA Kings. He likes those, too.

  93. Long, long way to go before it’s NYR-LA … but I don’t think anybody will ever have an easy series vs. NYR (and vice versa).

  94. One of the tricks to killing time is to take a shower before the game. I try to do that nightly before games because it takes my mind off things and my beard is getting unruly and probably has food in it. That’s my best advice boneheads.

  95. I will add, though, that the Kings are just running over Mike Smith and annoying him and the Coyotes aren’t doing nearly enough about it.

    Paging Stu Bickel.

  96. I haven’t watched much of the Kings series, but I do have a question for those that have. What is the difference between the Kings in the regular season where they barely made the playoffs and the Kings in the playoffs that are dominating?

  97. Carp can you also ask him about stepping on the logo and about what Brodeur’s comments regarding shot-blocking were?

  98. Joe is no JD, tough shoes to fill, but I think he tries to be as honest as possible. Is he the best in the league no i dont think so. But I like him.

  99. iWicky "Rupp Yours". LGT!!! on

    Look out big hambone is Facebook stalking you!

    In case I don’t make it back here before the game starts, LGR LGT LGM LGD !!

    Must noogie game

  100. If he’s going to tonight’s game he already parted with at least 12 of them. What’s one more?

  101. iWicky "Rupp Yours". LGT!!! on

    The bahama bomba deserves a ring (if we win of course)

    I honestly don’t think the NHL is going to let a strike/lockout happen after this season. They couldn’t be that stupid right….right?

  102. Take out a reverse mortgage, NYR. It’ll be good, but it won’t nearly be worth it. I’d suggest the burger at half the price.

  103. Agreed Carp, Ny vs La is a long way off, and the kings are just running Smith a couple times a game with no resistance. There have been penalty calls but apparently they are confident enough on the PK to just run him and get through the 2 mins.

  104. Ria(the silent bonehead) on

    Sally had to step out for awhile . I’m doing well thank you how about you? Got any snow?

  105. Incorrect, wick, they can be, have been, are and will be that stupid if they can squeeze an extra nickel out of the union.

  106. Manny, *no stalking.* And did you miss my Wesley Willis reference? Sad.

    Wicky, don’t be jealous.

    *RUM HAM*

  107. True Fans Bleed RW&B on


    Torts also really likes when you ask him about third men in penalties and childhood bully stories from the bus stop. Throw a curve ball like that in there too.

  108. a couple of more questions for Torts at the next presser:
    – Does he approve of Hank’s ‘heading’ of the puck?
    – Do the Rangers actually practice their stick salute?
    – Why isn’t he dressing the Answer? (this one is too easy – ‘next question’
    – How is Cally’s finger? Boyles Head?, Girardi’s face?
    – Is there any chance he would call an ‘icing’ timeout other than the 2nd period?
    – If the Rangers win the Cup, will he ever do a hair-dye commercial with Clyde and Keith where he would get to say the line ‘next question’?

  109. better beans on

    “Callahan at 25%…” is about as sharp as “Krejci is a throwaway.”

    Girardi had two awful periods the other night, perhaps crucially awful,
    if McD hadn’t come to the rescue. He’s had a ton of awful periods
    since January, when he was playin’ at a Norris level. But do not
    look for fatigue as a simple, straightforward demonstration of Occam’s
    Razor. Fatigue has been banished
    from the Hamelinite lexicon. We live in Ranger ComicBook Land…

    As a serious horseplayer, I am very curious what concoctions Dan G and
    others used at second intermission last go-round. (Ooops, I apologize in
    advance: hockey’s the only absolutely drug-free zone in the nation. Why do I
    keep forgetting that?) Reminds me of the San Fran announcers who kept
    publicly claiming Barry’s head had turned into a giant pumpkin ’cause he was
    eating more pie.

    If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, quacks like a duck – why, it’s a Ranger!

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