Happy Festivus!


Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reach for the last one they had – but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way!

The Human Fund. Money for people.

There are about a thousand lines from that episode that make you guffaw.

Here’s a link from the Seinfeld site about Festivus!

Here is the entire script from the Festivus episode, entitled “The Strike.”

You can click around the Seinfeld site (above) and/or the TBS site, I believe, and watch the episode online. Don’t hold me to that.

You make a lot of man friends. You know who’s a man? Charlie here, he’s a man. You know who else? Me. I’m a man.

I’m a man.

Now, let the airing of grievances begin. We can do this all morning. Later on we’ll talk about tonight’s game (against Tampa Bay) and I’ll put up the pre-game notes, etc. Not sure yet if I will be able to make it to MSG with a bunch of other work stuff on my plate (plus the feats of strength).

If you’re hungry, go get yourself an Atomic Sub. Or an H&H bagel.

Hey! I have spent a lot of time, and I have eaten a lot of crap to get to where I am today. And I am NOT throwing it all away now.

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  1. Olga Folkyerself on

    Crack of Midnight!

    Festivus! For the Rest of Us!

    Let the Airing of Grievances begin!

    Dolan! You have disappointed me yet again!


    DO IT!!!! (smack on forehead)

  2. Olga Folkyerself on

    Another Grievance- People that submit early grievances before the official date. You know who you are!

  3. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    A mild mild grievance:

    It requires a lisp to say Jesper’s last name correctly.

    Fasthpth spit

  4. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    Oh Great Carpini, if you have not yet retired for the evening, that first link is bad :(

  5. U Otto Folkyerself on

    Do you know who wrote “I’m Dreaming of a While Christmas”?

    They oughta kill that Folkyer! He probably retired off the royalties and moved to Florida.

  6. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    God bless him and you at all of 21 are bopping your bologna – go figure :)

  7. Midas Will Folkyerself on

    I can’t wait for Christmas to come.

    That’s when they’ll stop playing that Byfuglien Xmas music!

  8. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    Otto- I knew he had to be a one hit wonder – Irving Berlin? who??

    some of his other junk

    Blue Skies

    God Bless America

    Puttin’ on the Ritz- (from the movie Young Frankenstein)

  9. Slatsko Folkyerself on

    Same with the idiot that wrote “Let it Snow, Let it Snow, Let it Snow”. I’d like to shove my snow shovel where his sun don’t shine! Blade first!

  10. Owen Folkyerself II on

    Irving Berlin also wrote “God Bless America”, sung by Kate Smith to give the Flyers the edge in playoff games.

    Put him back on the Carcillo list, and Kate Smith too!

  11. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    “The Twelve Days of Christmas” now that’s a song that makes you feel like you drank a “100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall”

  12. Happy Festivus all!!

    Yes, Carp! LMBAO!!!! or LMHAO!

    thanks ilbGREAT!!!

    Here’s my early grievances…Pitt, Philly, Debs, Fishsticks, war, world hunger, a bunch of people I can’t mention here, people who talk on cell phones while driving, food shopping, anything in front of me, litterbugs, non-pooper scoopers, hartnellers, carcillos, kitty stink eye, cold weather.

    I’m sure there’s more, cause I’m very aggrieved :)

    P.S. Forget who mentioned this, but awesome on the bagel protest!

  13. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on


    A) Is that lil piggy your packin’ blue?

    B) If you can’t handle the heat stay out of the incubator

    C) You’ll be an old fart sooner than you know- get off you ass.


  14. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    Here’s my early grievances…Pitt, Philly, *Debs*

    I got ascared when I saw that at first

  15. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    Dint want to experience the wrath of Mama i.e.’the Sunday paper’

  16. That paper causes cybernetic damage. I’d hate to start posting like Olga due to all the cybernetic trauma to the cybernetic head.

    Time to sleep. I have to get at least five hours of sleep to prepare for a potential loss. After the Bolts blew a lead against a crappy team, they’ll be very upset. Should be a scary one.

  17. Joekuh-rury-mire on

    My grievance – that the Knicks couldn’t have looked as good tonight against Miami last week

  18. here are just a few of my grievances:

    people in charge (Carp excluded)
    people who can’t go the speed limit
    the refs
    the cindy
    the carcillo
    the bettman
    the Canadian view that sarcastic words from Avery
    are horribly bad but a crippling blow by bertuzzi is easily forgiven…

  19. Happy Festivus gang!

    My grievances… people who text while driving, companies that decide to consolidate all in one place thus causing people to lose their jobs and move away from home to get another one, rude people, long hours, not getting phone calls returned in a timely manner, the lack of diners in St Louis, getting Crosby and Ovechkin shoved down my throat by the league, Crosby’s lame mustache-which is an abomination and would scare little kids, the Mets, people who wait until the last minute to merge on a highway on-ramp, slow interwebs connections, erratic discipline by the NHL, the cost of airport food, my alarm clock going off at 6am everyday, weather people who freak out at the tinest bit of precipitation, bad pizza, car commercials, doing the dishes, arrogance, people who refer to themselves in the third person and paying to check my bags at an airport.

    There may be more, depending on how things go tomorrow.

    Have a wonderful, fun day, and I’ll see you all when I’m back on the east coast.

  20. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    here are some of my grievances…i will go into greater detail later.

    dane cook, tom brady, peter gammons, mike milbury, john buccigross, mark wahlberg, matt damon, ben affleck, jennifer garner, peter gammons, peter gammons, peter gammons, pierre maguire, boston cream pie, new england clam chowder, boston barbecue sauce, skip bayless, bill simmons, curt schilling, pete abe, amalie benjamin, nick cafardo, buster olney, peter gammons, peter gammons, bob ryan, mike lupica, mike lupica, mike lupica, mike lupica, mike lupica, jon heyman, mike lupica, Andy Brickley. jack edwards, Sam Adams Boston Lager. Peter Gammons. Stephen Tyler. Dane Cook. Neil Diamond. Dropkick Murphys. Stephen King. Skip Bayless. Tom Verducci. Buster Olney. Peter Gammons. michael smith, michael holley, tommy heinsohn, curt schilling, nomar garciaparra, dennis eckersley, jim rice, tom caron, don orsillo, jerry “Monterey Jack” remy, gordon edes, chris forsberg, Kevin McHale, danny ainge, kevin garnett, dan shaughnessy, boston tea party, boston marathon, amy k nelson, keith law, rob neyer, jon miller, joe buck, tim mccarver, joe micheletti, michael kay, jim patriots nantz, phil patriots simms, mike celtics breen, erin andrews, wendi nix, gary bettman, roger goodell, david stern, bud selig, senator george mitchell, ted kennedy, bobby orr, cam neely, larry bird, rajon rondo, glen davis, gronkowski, welker, gostkowski, tim thomas, milan lucic, zdeno chara, tuuuuukkkkkkaaaaa rask, Good Will Hunting. Fever Pitch. Peter Gammons. Boston Legal. The Practice. Boston Public. Cheers. chris berman, bill simmons, Peter Gammons. Denis Leary. Louis CK. Peter Gammons. Dane Cook. Peter Gammons. Boston Buffalo Wings. Boston Baked Beans. Peter Gammons. Peter Gammons, Peter Gammons. Let me not forget, Peter Gammons.

  21. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    jeff triplett, kerry fraser, bill mccreary, bob delaney, d*ck bavetta, steve javvy, javier vazquez, gene steratore, bill belichick, tim mcclelland, joe west, angel hernandez, and many many many many many many many many many many many many many more referees/umpires that i cant remember the names of immediately.

  22. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    In a feat of strength, I have the integrity to acknowledge referee Howard Webb of the English Premier League to be the fairest and best referee I have ever seen. I’d also like to extend a heartfelt THANK YOU to NFL referee Mike Carey for calling Super Bowl XLII fairly and allowing the Super Bowl Champion New York Giants a fair shake in that game.

  23. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    First and foremost, wow, Tiki wow, can you say issues?

    transcribed by me, not with total precision

    Q. Del Zotto?

    Torts. Out tomorrow

    Q. Out?

    Torts. Out tomorrow

    Q. Is that.. I mean is that strictly illness related..we had talked about his play the last time we talked to you, you said you weren’t sure?

    Torts. (overlapping question at about second you) Yeah, I wasn’t sure what I was doin’ but I.. ah.. Gilly’s gonna play..Gilly’s gonna play

    Maybe SeamusO needs to be recruited here, but notice how Torts doesn’t really answer the question. He’s protecting MDZ. Add the bogus tweet about him being sick. Yeah, I am a conspiricy theorist.


  24. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    ddeb – come on now! this is supposed to be fun; it was all in good fun :)

    this is a serious grievance…with myself…i think often about quitting New York, quitting NY teams, and yes, quitting our Rangers. i often think that my life would be better off without this crazed obsession and devotion to everything New York. every time i have those thoughts, it’s a betrayal of the greatest place and the greatest people in the world.

  25. ddebened bows before the sequined cape, leather wearing Great Carpini on

    I love you Tiki, for you are a Bonehead!

  26. Linda CalPrustBoylahan on


    Morning grievances:

    making 33% less that this time last year, people who are not their true selves from the get go, people who don’t use their turn signal/directional, people who don’t let you merge onto the parkway, Christmas songs sung by Elvis, Mariah Carey and Celine Dion, the Grinch,people in positions of importance who have no business being there, blog trolls, facebook updates every 2 months, people who text while driving, especially teenagers and cops lol, women who drive vehicles that are taller than they are, people who worship at the altar of narcissism, rushing holidays, that piece of Carcillo bettman and his forcing of sausage lips upon the masses,not being able to send my beloved boneheads goodies this year, people being called a band when they don’t play their own instruments, sending money all over the world while we have people in our own country who truly need help, criminals being glorified, James Dolan and the Wilpons.

    That’s all I can think of for now

  27. Happy Festivus Boneheads!!

    Grievances: Cindy Crysby whining, Matt Cooke breathing, Flyers winning, Bettman ruling, Versus announcing, nin-fame days, games without Step-on’s mom in attendance, Gabby injured, Avery on the fourth line, Drury & Rozy’s contracts.

    Let’s go Rangers tonight!!

  28. Linda CalPrustBoylahan on

    thanks for clarifying Mess, i thought it was a nine inch nails reference!!

    OH YEA, another grievance or two:

    people telling you how to live, and then doing the exact opposite (people who don’t practice what they preach), Carp NOT having a cape!

  29. Sidney Crosby, Gary Bettman, Philadelphia, the Brooklyn bound 4/5 express trains between 7:55 to 8:15 AM Monday-Friday, the Bronx bound 4/5 express trains all other times, Bud Selig, termites, carpenter ants, Ticketmaster, Cablevision, Jim Dolan, Fred Wilpon, Jeff Wilpon, future Wilpons, VS, NBC, Fox, firewalls, Adobe Flash updates.

  30. Grievance—— Cindy Crosby is playing in the NHL instead of the womens hockey leauge where he belongs, the hot dog lips doesnt even need a cup( athletic supporter)

  31. Gift of GAB-orik *(26)* on

    Speaking of Lisps and grievances….

    Who is the cruel jerk who put an ‘S’ in the word Lisp? That’s just mean.

  32. Flyers,pronger,clarke,richards,fox news, devil fans,cindy,fishsticks,palin,harry reid,tea baggers,mel bridgeman,sather,W,barney frank,sean handjob,ken linesman,denis potvin, lou l.,marty b.,mets,bill parcell,nba basketball after 1988, pedro,wayne cashman,behn wilson,keith acton,the color orange,sting,bad christmas songs,chardonney,redden,poti,trots,messier post ’97,sudden blackhawk fans, devil fans again, non hitting defenseman, garth snow, hextall,the city of Philadelphia in general………..

  33. Good Morning Everyone:

    Current Number 1 Hit on my Billboard Top 100 Grievances:

    Having to work today, and being expected to actually WORK while I am here.

  34. Greetings and Happy Festivus

    Grievances are as follows (not necessarily in this order):

    People who update their Facebook every 5 minutes…I don’t really care that your at the doctor’s office, the mall, getting gas, eating a sandwich, changing a stinky diaper, etc…get it?

    Crosby…the man-boy (and I use that term loosely), and the dog (my sister in law named her dog Crosby to be neutral…since her kids are 1 Ranger fan and 1 Devil fan)

    Mariah Carey…like skate blades on concrete to me.

    People who think they are entitled to MORE, when they get plenty already. For example, we are lucky enough to have Christmas Eve off and the entire following week as well. BUT, people STILL want to leave early today…WTB?

    People who can’t pronounce Byfuglien, Iginla, etc…

    I’m sure there’s more…

  35. new greivance- people who take forever to get their stuff out in the security line at the airport and then take forever to re-pack their stuff. grab it and go folks!!

  36. N,CountryNYRFan on

    My Grievances:

    lame winter classic this year, refs usual bias against our rangers, lack of sleep, bettman, working today, Canadaian drivers (especially from Quebec, the worst), Marty B., the Devils, the Flyers, the Yankees, annoying people, Msnbc, Joe M. drooling over every team that plays against the Rangers, when the Rangers traded Mike Gartner, todays music, bud light, hockey taking a backseat to sports like basketball, womans basketball, weight gain, NY Times, Nancy Pelosi, Kanye West, the Dallas Cowboys, and the Rangers not winning the Stanley Cup since 1994. Thats all.

    Happy Festivus!!

  37. Jay Riemenschneider on

    Hockey related… the Rangers when they lose, horrible officiating, Gary Byfuglien Bettman.

    Non hockey related… holiday travel, the Rangers when they lose, horrible officiating, auto-tuned pop music, people who wear special xmas outfits and/or clothing, xmas music, that good pinball machines are so expensive, bad tv commercials, that my gf won’t let me trapse around with other younger ladies.

    Happy Festivus!

  38. Noah-allahan, 28 on

    “Hey Kooger! My son says your company stinks!”

    “You couldn’t smooth a silk sheet if you had a hot date with…I lost my train of thought.”


  39. My Grievances:

    Agressive drivers (in general) – but especially you in the green explorer with the faded bumber sticker, I Byfuglien hate you.

    Sorry – maybe a bit too harsh. But it felt good to post.

    Lets go Rangers!!!!

  40. Johnny, I see you’re sticking with the denim.

    Some of my grievances:

    That piece of carcillo Cooke; that piece of cooke Carcillo.

    People on the phone or texting while driving. People who have to walk around in circles while talking on the phone in an airport or a city street.

    Politicians (99 percent of them give the rest a bad name).

    Noise/overly loud music at sporting events (how do basketball fans live with the constant stuff DURING play?).

  41. From the excerpt on ESPN insider, (please make sure you have a vomit receptacle nearby):

    “With Sidney Crosby sporting a 10-point lead over Steven Stamkos in the Art Ross race and a 10-goal, 18-point gap between himself and Alexander Ovechkin, The Kid is pulling away from the pack this season and clearly showing himself to be the preeminent forward of his generation. That greatness becomes even more impressive when put into the context of this
    season and, if it continues, could rank this campaign as one of the best in NHL history.”

    Crosby’s season has him on pace for 135 points if he plays all 82, 33rd best season point total. Please stop with thinking he’s going to come close to touching Gretzky’s records. Even Lemieux’s for the Pens team records. Lemieux had 160 in 60 games the year he battled Hodgkins.

  42. “Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reach for the last one they had – but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way!”

    This makes me laugh every time. GOLD, JERRY!

  43. Gift of GAB-orik *(26)* on

    People who are talking on a cell phone entering a business establishment such as a coffee place/deli/fast food joint etc… and continue to speak while on line, and while ordering. HANG THE DAMN PHONE UP.

    Nobody in the place cares about your worthless conversation. And no… you don’t look important, you look like more of a (rhymes with swoosh hag)

    People who race up to red lights only to slam on the brakes, people in malls who text while walking…. texting in general. It takes LONGER to text a conversation than to just pick up the phone!!

  44. John MacLean
    Jacques Lemaire
    Billy Martin
    Jacques Lemaire
    Larry Robinson
    …Billy Martin
    Pat Burns
    Jacques Lemaire
    Billy Martin….

  45. I cannot stand people who speed up to red lights.

    The worst is those idiots in the slow lane who speed up like it’s their life mission to get in front of you when you are trying to merge onto the highway. Then to slam on their brakes because someone is in front of them in the slow lane. If I didn’t have the right mind I’d follow these people and beat them to death with my bare hands.

    And how about those people that just stand on the escalators? IT’S NOT A RIDE!

  46. Noah-allahan, 28 on

    Ditto Stan.

    I’ll be up in the 400’s so I’m not even sure I will be able to see MZA from that far away.

  47. Pardon Me Machetto on

    Pardon Me Carp, but I would like to air my grievance about Joe Micheletti.

    Other grievances (strictly hockey-related):

    How everyone has to fight any time there is a hard hit, even when it’s clean;

    When John Giannone does play-by-play;

    Bill Pidto, Ron Duguay, Butch Goring, and Ken Daneyko;

    Chico Resch (deserved his own spot);

    Joe Begnignani (also deserved his own spot);


    people that compare Crosby’s point streak to Gretzky’s;

    People that compare anything of Crosby’s to Gretzky’s (unless it’s skating ability and strength, in which case it’s Crosby, hands down, too bad he flops like a fish at the slightest touch);

    Chris Drury’s contract, Michael Rozsival’s contract, Wade Redden’s contract, Matt Gilroy’s contract, and Derek Boogaard’s contract;

    Glen Sather still being the GM;

    MDZ’s decisions with the puck;

    Girardi and Staal pokechecking;

    Gaborik’s production;

    Frolov’s production;

    every other team in the Atlantic Divison, but especially the Flyers and Penguins;

    hockey not being on ESPN;

    the Rangers getting bumped to MSG 2 instead of MSG Plus;

    the Rangers getting bumped at all;

    the unavailability of 400 level season tickets;

    Sean Avery’s inability to do anything wrong in the eyes of the common fan;

    The Rangers’ home record;

    Lundqvist’s inconsistencies/lack of focus;

    People that think Gary Bettman has any power and isn’t just doing whatever the owners tell him to do since he is just their agent and can’t go against their wishes;

    Mike Green;

    No stay at home defensemen ever winning the Norris Trophy or getting selected for the all-star game;

    Purely offensive defensemen who have no skill defending winning the Norris or getting selected for the all-star game;

    Jaromir Jagr losing the Hart, Art Ross, and Richard trophies in 05-06;

    7.7 seconds;

    Aaron Ward and Matt Cullen;

    Tom Renney, Bryan Trottier, Ron Low, and John Muckler;

    Alexei Kovalev and all other past/present Ranger killers;

    The shootout and the fictional 3 point game;

    When John Amirante doesn’t sing the National Anthem;

    Ace Frehley;

    Sunday games;

    and tying everything back up with the top:

    JD being in St. Louis instead of NY.

  48. Grievance – a GM that has plenty if opportunities to fire his coach but waits until the day before Christmas to fire the guy for a mess that the GM created. Merry F’ing Christmas from Lou. He is so hateable.

  49. And a good Festivus morning to you, Carp!

    Okay here I go. I wanna second kitty stink eye & auto tune. Other grievances: UB School of Social Work, Hot Dog Lips & Mouth Breather Malkin, my roommate’s boyfriend, people who whine about Buffalo winters, Steve Montador not knowing what a matzoh ball is, being out of the loop on bonehead lingo, dog farts.


  50. Forgot to mention about MacLean’s firing that as a Ranger fan, I should be laughing but firing the guy the day before Christmas is deplorable and actually makes me feel bad for MacLean.

  51. Happy Festivus!!!

    My grievences:

    1. People who get free daycare when I have to pay full price.
    2. People who clog up emergeny rooms and don’t pay anyway while I wait bleeding from a high stick in a pickup game.
    3. Lazy people (like Mr. Softy the Backstabber).
    4. Joe Michelleti (Sean Hannity’s evil twin).
    5. Derek Boogaard. (Carkner’s b*tch).
    6. People who criticize guest bloggers that are dead on with their assesments (and have none of their own).
    7. People who poo-poo my brilliant trade scenarios.
    8. People who pretend they have inside team connections. (except for that one guy that really does).
    9. Islander fans (who all live in their mother’s basements).
    10. Anyone who disses Sean Avery.

    Happy Festivus everyone. And as my feat of strenghth, I am gonna hoist as many pints of fine crafted beer as I can in honor of the Boneheads.

    Thank you Carp for a fine blog,

  52. Pardon Me Machetto on

    Pardon Me Carp, but they actually all came to me pretty quickly. I just typed and they came to me as I typed. Once I didn’t have one lined up, I called it a day.

  53. Pardon Me Machetto on

    Pardon Me Festivus, but my feat of strength for the evening will be not smashing my head into the wall at my wife’s friend’s Christmas party.

  54. Wow, Lou fires Jmac on the day of a game, and a day before x-mas, and the new(old) coach isnt even in town yet

    Looks like the Fishsticks might go ahead of the debbies tonight.

    and someone just pointed out to me that if you really listen to the lyrics to “Baby it’s cold outside” that the song seems to be kind of date rapey.

    Very funny, take a listen to it and see if you agree

    Merry Christmas to my Christian Brother & sisters!
    Happy Hanukah to my jewish Brothers & Sisters!
    Happy Quanza to whoever celebrates that!

    And Merry Chrsitmas to Carp!! The Blogfather himself!

    and Happy festivus to the rest of us!!

    LETS GO RANGERS!! see you all after the holiday

  55. grievance # 3:
    “Friends” calling me after the game when I’m still watching the recorded game 3 hours later.
    Nothing like knowing the end during the first period !

  56. people who talk on cell phones while checking out at stores
    people who wear hair gel and calogne to go to the gym
    chico resch
    chico resch
    chico resch
    children who have no respect for their teachers/fellow students/elders
    the price of gasoline
    the price of a deli sandwich
    people who use the squat rack at the gym to do anything other then squat/deadlift when other people are waiting to use it for what its meant for
    people who go to the gym 5 days a week to benchpress and bicep curl
    dunkin dougnuts ice coffee in brooklyn tasting like sewer water
    people who ask for advice then dont take it
    Jackie MacMullen
    cooworkers who dont do thier job and just make your job that much more difficult
    bud light
    sweet potatoe chips
    chico resch
    john gianone

  57. I really hate those commuter train riders who put their feet up on the seats. How bloody selfish is that?!

  58. wicky(grating CCBG)© (The game’s not over until somebody cries!!) on

    Great Festivus morning ILB and all!

    I of course am off to work, soo see you guys after the dvr!!


  59. Well folks, tbw and I finally made it up here to sunny CT, and I’m in the process of freezing my Shremps off. I though t I’d have left all that really cold weather in Florida. I am in now in no position to view any Rangers game ( or any hockey games) because my youngsters are non
    believers. Only know college and pro football and basketball. ( I failed somewhere along the line, but their TVs are not connected. Coming into Bradley field, we made the hardest bloody landing I ever was involved in. I thought I’d see the landing gear shoved up into the fuselage when we debarked. The pilot apologized. He said that sometimes it’s hard to shake a hangover.

    It’s true. Three of my grand daughters are several inches taller than I am. My daughter finally pulled me aside and said once again, ” Dad…everybody is taller than you”. ( Used to be 5′ 7″…now only 5′ 5″. What’s happening…the amazing shrinking man.

    I’ll out last it…it’s only til Jan 3, and back in the mix again. Keep the news coming, cause you’re the only lifeline I have to the action. If you insist on baring all of your inadequencies and your perverted inclinations, I’ll suffer thru them…the least I can do to get informed.

  60. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    “My first grievence:
    When I record a game on Direct TV & get home to find the game “blacked out in your area”

    TONY TONY TONY! Oy, how I hate that too! If you ever miss a Rangers game, or Giants or Yankees, let me know, I get them all on DVD :)

  61. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    oh, and i think Carp’s right. I feel like an idiot…I forgot on my list of grievances, Peter Gammons

  62. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    Tony – LOL! That’s better than receiving emails repeatedly about enlarging my breasts :)

  63. Good morning all! Happy Festivus! Morning grievance: getting woken up by a sales call from the company that laid you off.

    I think my fave of all here so far though is nin-fame days!

  64. BTW Crosby’s point streak is pure BS. For some of those points he is well beyond the secondary assist.

  65. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    another grievance: It says on a Facebook program that I will be killed by BlogMama in 2011. I know Mama has special powers, but now Im afraid…

  66. Izzy Mandlebaum on

    Crack of Noon!

    Grievances- (not an inclusive list)

    Anyone who thinks they are #1
    Macho Head Games
    Sather still GM
    Dolan lives
    anything Crosby- Sid, Bing, Denise, Norm, David, Gary, Cathy Lee
    Blackout games that put Sabres on MSG
    Budweiser Beer
    Dallas Cowboys
    Every supervisor I ever had
    Barbara Streisand
    Philadelphia Flyers
    Sweet Tea
    TV ads
    SPAM phone calls
    My High School and everyone in it
    Mean Drunks
    Throwing up

  67. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    grievance: having 15 watchers on each of your ebay listings and not getting any damn bids! Harumph!

  68. Tiki - I heart Brett Favre on

    grievance: being accused of framing someone for the murder of myself in 2011.

    grievance: false alibis……nobody give mama a false alibi :)

  69. grievance: being accused of framing tiki for framing me for the murder of himself in 2011.

    also, having to get my byfuglien butt in gear and leaving to do errands in the freeze.

  70. Are they Cards fans Tony? What in the world do they have to talk about? Blowing the SB to the Steelers a few years ago? Or are they Eagles fans? Blowing half a dozen NFC championship games the last decade.

  71. grievance:

    Crappy MSG commercials I’m subjected to when the game is not on DVR playback.
    Scrap Metal
    Mens clothing

  72. I am not bitter. I just felt that in honor of Festivus, I would air my grievances…


    Blowzy has another year left on his contract

    Gaby has been playing with a bad groin and probably re-injured himself.

    Callahan has a broken hand.

    Hank is regressing and continues to left in softies more often this season ever in his career.

    The Rangers have virtually no chance to win the Atlantic division in the next 5-7 years so long as the Pens and Flyers keep their marquee players…Crosb*tch, Malkinstein, Stahl, Richards, Carter, Giroux, Zherdev…etc. Ugh.

    Can’t wait for the feats of strength!!!

  73. But, Izzy, that’s what puts the magic in Magic Pan.

    I don’t know how official any of these rankings are.

    Tony, did you hear about the Giants game?

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