And it’s only August


I noticed a lot of our Boneheads (term of endearment) are coming out of their summer caves as we get closer to actual hockey. Great to see the old names, although a few are still missing. Do you guys have any new Boneheads you could refer to this place?

I also thought the first day of banishment of imposters worked well. Didn’t you?


I was happy to see that Pittsburgh hired Tony Granato as an assistant coach. I know that makes him the enemy in the eyes of a lot of you guys. But I’m glad for him. He’s a good hockey man. Wish he would make his way back to New York one day.


Since there isn’t much going on at the moment, I wanted to throw a Seinfeld nugget at you. I just discovered this the other night, a big error in the program: When Kramer is suing the coffee company, lawyer Jackie Chiles asks him if the cafe latte had a top on, and whether he put the top on or they put the top on. But when Kramer walks out of the coffee store there is no top on his cafe latte. And he puts one on before he shoves it inside his shirt at the movie theater. It’s scandalous, isn’t it.

I know, I know. Get a life Carp.


Going out for another attempted meeting with Mr. Titleist this morning. Been a while, but five of my eight or nine attempts have been cut short by lightning and torrential rain. Hopefully today brings a conclusion.

I’ll check in later.


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  1. Sounds exciting, its about to rain again pretty hard soon for an hour or two Carp so be careful out there

  2. Grabachev in IA on

    oh, and its mike in ia. i just changed it. somebody posted yesterday about some of our prospects and called grachev “grabachev”, not once but twice!! i thought it was funny so i changed it from mike to grabachev.

    hey, linda- saw you post earlier- i told you i was changin my name, i see you already caught it. lol. its not too hard. but you mentioned shoryuken, and i havent seen him for a long time. wonder if he changed nbames too.

  3. Hey Carp,

    Been reading the blog for a looooong time, just never posted a comment. Wanted to say thanks for all the posts, and this is one of the sites that I check pretty much everyday (even in the barren off-season)!

  4. Grabachev in IA on

    carp- my sister who is a ranger fan (i like to think it had something to do with me), comes on this site now once in awhile and she likes the place. she loves talkin to ranger fans who arefunny and passionate about the team. she’ll be back now the imposters are she’ll become a fully member of the lohud bonehead gang.

  5. Hey Carp don’t worry about the rain/lightning –> “I don’t think the heavy stuff’s gonna come for quite some time.” –Carl Spackler (Bill Murray)

  6. hmmm — still lurking —

    It’s like we traded away Gomez – a pivot who could always get the zone – who just needed someone to dish to ..

    and got Gaborik – someone who will be in the zone who just needs someone to dish it to him ..

    i’m not complaining, cuz I think gomer was soft as brie (and yes I used a french cheese simile :)

    but we need some chocolate for Gabs Peanut butter

    ok – obviously I’m hungry! LOL!

  7. Guys, I want to know your very honest oppinion, if Slats will make a financial/trade miracle and get a rabbit-(Heatley)out of a hat, will you be happy? Or.. (Granted,we need non-existant 1 line center).
    Please,just don’t use “cancer in the locker room” line.

  8. You see, Theo, what the Rangers need is to get a number one center who can pass the puck to Gaborik and the frazzle dazzle.

  9. Honestly i think it would be awesome to have Heatley and Gaborik on the first line, But who is goin to center that line. If they can get Heatley without giving up Dubinsky i will be fine with it. Dubinsky is part of the core of this Team with Cali, Staal and Hank. To have those four guys as the core of this team for years to come would be great and something that could be built around.

  10. In my honest opinion The Rangers will NOT get Heatley.

    We will be discussing Heatley,Zherdev and everything concerning Ranger youth and prospects with Jess Rubenstein from the Prospect Park on Ranger Crisis Radio TONIGHT 9-11PM EST

    I’d love to have you guys call in and participate. I would like to hear your vibe on Zherdev’s departure and what young guy you are rooting for to make the team this year.

    The call in Number is (347) 857-2090

    To Listen:

  11. Bill Cosby
    Whom you call Theo?
    Every little boy in town,who ever saw a puck knows about Rangers 1st line center problem, but “I have a Dream..”, could I?

  12. Gravey - Formerly known as Jor71 on

    I do not think we have what it will take to get Heatley. Say what you will, he would have been a great addition on this team. 2 bona-fide scoring threats on a team is a huge plus.

  13. Dubi, Dubi, Do?

    Everyone has a high opinion of Dubi, myself included. He plays hard every night at both ends of the ice. However, the results last year were less than eye-opening. Should Slats sign the kid to a one year deal and hope for improved offensive numbers or lock him up longer term?

  14. The Mouth,
    First, thanks for your great and fun job.Always checking your site.Second I do know Heat will NOT coming, moreso I believe within next 48 hours: Heatly-to Sharks, Marleau to Habs, Plekanec,Halak (or Harmlik)to Ottawa.But at this uneventful times I want at least a)a Miracle, b)a Dream,c)something to talk about to help and support Carp in his great effort to keep us going. Thank you.

  15. Lock Dubi up at his low price, he will only get better. Sather has gotta sign Staal, Girarardi and Higgins next year. If he had to re-sign Dubinsky too, we would be in more trouble than we already are.

  16. What do we think Dubi will sign for? I was thinking a 2 year deal like Cally worth 1.1ish? thoughts? This needs to happen but at this stage im not worried of another team coming out and swooping him up and out of NY with a high offer sheet. That would have happened already IMO.

  17. Callahan and Dubinsky are great Rangers but I would never make either an Alternate, they’re just too young. I can’t imagine veterans would take guys in their third full NHL season seriously. Sure the heart is there but the experience isn’t.

  18. Hey guys, since I was prompted to, just wanted to introduce myself. I read the blog and comments a number of times a day, but since I’m at work when I do I don’t usually have the time to comment. Love the blog, especially how it continues to bond with its readers. Great work, keep the news coming for us hockey starved individuals! Anyone on this thing live in Atlanta like me? I need to meet some local Rangers fans.

  19. I watched Rangers Classic yesterday Rangers vc Avs.
    Everybody was flying. Not Dubi. Have a lot of confused feeling about him. 1st year with Jags was promissing. Last year expected more — did not come up yet. Does he have enough just to play with super stars? Cally played very good all games with effort. They are very different.
    Have see nothing special in Dubi. May be I’m wrong. If so, plz correct me.

  20. JJP – talent can trump experience when it comes to A’s and C’s. Look at Pittsburgh. Not saying I agree, just saying it does. I voted for Callahan for an A.

    Carp, why can’t we vote for 2 A’s in your poll?

  21. “At what point can a player be considered a veteran?”

    I’ll go with five years experience. Players don’t get a pension through the NHLPA until they’ve played 400 NHL games, which says to me that the players don’t consider someone part of the club until they’ve been around for five seasons.

  22. What’s going on with Blair Betts?

    I’m shocked he hasn’t signed with Edmonton yet to join Renney.

    Is he still banged up from that Brashear hit?

  23. Speed Ranger – I agree but you’re comparing Crosby and Malkin to Callahan and Dubinsky, it’s not even close.

    Look around the league, the young C’s and A’s are All-Star level talent….Crosby, Ovechkin, Malkin, Nash, Toews, Phaneuf, E. Staal, Getzlaf, Kopitar, Richards.

    Dubinsky and Callahan aren’t close to that level yet.

  24. flippedturtle on

    I think you lock Dubi up for two years that gives us time to see if he makes strides towards the amazing amount of potential he has. The kid has every tool to be a 30+ goal scorer and the captain of this team down the road.

    For all the years I hoped to see the rangers build from with-in we are finally seeing those guys Dubi, Cally and Staal along with Henry should not be moved in my opinion.

    On another note anyone else feel sorry for Montreal? If they do get Marleau can you imagine a softer team in the NHL? Can you imagine what the Toronto Montreal rivalry will look like? Toronto is looking like a big mean team going to be interesting when we play them.

  25. I don’t see where Brooks is coming from in his last article, regarding the Rangers’ “patchwork of players from outposts around the league”

    Gaborik is an upgrade over Zherdev

    Higgins and Kotalik are upgrades, scoring wise, over Korpikoski and Sjostrom

    And now Callahan, Dubinsky and Anisimov have a chance to get major ice time

    Letting Gomez go, along with Morris, Betts and Mara opens up two spots in the middle and two on defense for Del Zotto, Gilroy, Sanguetti and Boyle to fill-in.

    Renney is gone replaced by Torts.

    I see a team, baring serious injury, that has been upgraded offensively. Hopefully we’ll have a better PP that will produce more wins, plus we should be tougher to play against.

    With guys like Grachev, Gilroy, DZ, AA, Kreider, Potter, I think we have a very positive future.

  26. “At what point can a player be considered a veteran?”

    I’d say 5 years in, and possessing the ability to grow a playoff beard.

  27. The Other Tony In Arizona on

    Been reading this site for awhile and appreciate everyone’s opinions(at least when it pertains to hockey) Between NHL Center-Ice and my annual trek to MSG this blog hits the spot.At least the Rangers will be down here to play the Coyotes this year,though I am sure that they will try to make you buy a package of useless games to get a ticket.I am hopeful that they give some of the kids a shot to make the team this year……I can hope huh! Hey Carp,come down to Phoenix-there’s more courses bathed in sunshine that you can shake a stick at & they’re cheap now-heat stroke rates-110 in the shade!!

  28. Im very excited about this season, hearing Avery talk about the team the other day and Drury actually sounded like the captain in his interview pumps me up! This team is goin to be very exciting under Torts, we just got a taste of it last year and i cant wait! You add Higgins and Gabs to the Mix and hey we actually have a chance to see a Hat-Trick at the garden again!

  29. “Wow! 19 votes for Redden getting an “A”!”

    I guess redden owns a computer.

    Carp, what did you shoot on your “rain dance” today?

  30. I think Bra-zear should get an “A” considering its the first letter to what he is!! Sorry I just hate this guy. SOOOOOO much!!

  31. Orr,

    Are you gonna call in the Mouth’s show tonight so you can chat it up with your boy, Jess? If so, I will defintally be listening to that!

  32. I don’t think Dubi had a bad year the puck just didn’t bounce his way and he wasn’t playing with Jagr. He was surrounded by no-talent scrubs much of the time Renney was figuring out the lines.

    “Sather has gotta sign Staal, Girarardi and Higgins next year.”

    I don’t think Higgins is a gotta sign.

  33. It’s funny, I keep waiting for Sather to make a move because you get the feeling he is not done with this roster. But if he makes yet another trade, do you realize the amount of roster turnover has gone on with this team?

  34. hahaha yeah
    the game thats on right now on msg its amazing how many of em are gone. not even a year later.

    gomez-zherdev-naslund the whole line is gone hahaha

  35. TR-808, in reference to the link you posted, specifically the part that went: “The latest has the San Jose Sharks and New York Rangers pushing hard for Heatley. The Sharks are rumored to send Christian Ehrhoff, Jonathan Cheechoo, and/or Douglas Murray and first round pick to the Senators, again, that’s the rumor. The Rangers are supposedly upping that, by offering Marc Staal, Brandon Dubinsky, and/or Ryan Callahan and some prospects.”

    if this trade (which i believe to be a silly rumour with absolutely no facts or logic supporting it), if it were to ever happen, i would seriously consider jumping ship and becoming a Senators fan because those are maybe my three favorite players on the team.

  36. theres no way the rangers trade all thet youth i kinda found the article funny

    dawes – korpo – prucha
    another whole line gone

  37. TR-808 – Yeah, it is amazing. This whole five-man unit that was just on the ice is gone: Betts, Orr, Sjostrom, Mara, Kalinin.

  38. can we move joe”say it two times” michelleti? he is awful. says everything twice. talks over sam. has bad timing when he interupts and often runs long. crap.

  39. Hey Carp-should we be concerned that dubi is not signed? Any inside info for us?

    Anyone-see Avery’s brother working at Warren 77? He looks just like Sean-glasses haircut and all..

  40. Troj wants to see Murdoch back on the ice !! on

    Is Betts actually gone?????
    I think that would be a huge mistake……. one of the few bright spots of last year was our penalty killing and Betts and Freddy Shoes were our top 2 guys on the PK.

  41. Troj- Betts is still a free agent, so he’s technically not “gone” yet. But really, they wouldn’t put him on a line with Brashear after what happened in the playoffs last year. They also have Boyle and Byers looking to fill the 4th line (which barely plays under Torts anyway).

    I’m a huge Betts fan, though, and wish we kept him, Shoes, and Orr intact. They were an excellent 4th line between the PK, Shoes’ shootout skills, and Orr’s fists. Lots of heart, and good role-playing, all at cheap cost.

  42. Troj wants to see Murdoch back on the ice !! on

    Yeah, I knew he was a UFA, but wasn’t sure if they had made it public that they don’t want to re-sign him.
    I know Torts is not a big 4th line guy, but the first 3 lines can’t play all game and effectively kill penalties too. Unfortunately for the Dubi guys, he is really the best fit for the 4th line C and 1st unit PK C with Dru as 2nd unit.
    And I am really hoping Anisimov gets the job centering for Gabby, it would be a shame to leave him on the 3rd or 4th line.

  43. no-I’m usually in there on Sat afternoon’s for lunch and his brother works there.. Have you been there at night? How is it? I’m assuming Sean is there in the evenings?

  44. GladBettsisGone on

    Betts was a good PKer, but had the offensive skills/instincts of Ryan Hollweg.

  45. 1. Redden 19 votes for A? You know who votes 19 times for him? WADE REDDEN

    2. No one cares about Seinfeld

    3. When Dubisnky re-signs it better be for more than 2 years…

  46. patrick

    i went last night cause i knew the new menu was going to be out.
    yesterday was the first time ive seen his brother NOT behind the bar. hes usually very busy, but it wasnt too busy and he was mingling w/ friends i assume. the whole staff there is extremely friendly. i always have a blast and feel extremely taken care of.

    i have met a couple of players (past and present) some stay for a while others come and go. its hard to say when sean is there. the last time i saw him it was for a nanosecond.

    weekend its really busy before midnight. it starts to empty out around 1230 and gets more comfortable.

    im there on saturdays if anyone is interested… think ive been saying this for over 3 months now, lol.

  47. Vogs- Amen; excellent post..I think the Rangers are younger and faster than last year.. Plus- Sather has left some spots open for the young kids. I don’t think we need to go out and get a #1 center. See what you have in camp first and if need be, make a move. Who knows-maybe the kid Anisimov can fit the bill. Let’s see what we have. Torts is exactly what this team’s to easy here and guys relax..

    I think people lose their objectivity in evaluating Sather because he is aloof, arrogant and spends half of his time in Palm Springs..the guy ain’t the greatest but we do have some legit prospects now and The Rangers and Devils are the only teams in the East to make the playoffs every year since the lockout.

    vogs August 6th, 2009 at 11:48 am

    I don’t see where Brooks is coming from in his last article, regarding the Rangers’ “patchwork of players from outposts around the league”

    Gaborik is an upgrade over Zherdev

    Higgins and Kotalik are upgrades, scoring wise, over Korpikoski and Sjostrom

    And now Callahan, Dubinsky and Anisimov have a chance to get major ice time

    Letting Gomez go, along with Morris, Betts and Mara opens up two spots in the middle and two on defense for Del Zotto, Gilroy, Sanguetti and Boyle to fill-in.

    Renney is gone replaced by Torts.

    I see a team, baring serious injury, that has been upgraded offensively. Hopefully we’ll have a better PP that will produce more wins, plus we should be tougher to play against.

    With guys like Grachev, Gilroy, DZ, AA, Kreider, Potter, I think we have a very positive future.

  48. PruBelongsOnTheIce on

    I was at that Rangers-Avs game… like 4 rows behind the Rangers bench. Anyone know if it’s going to re-air anytime?

  49. Was reading and they are talking about favorite memories of JR. One that sticks out for me, is a game I was at, at the Garden, when JR was playing for the Flyers, and he got him high and hard, and I think it is when he dislocated his jaw. I remember he was down for a while, and the crowd at the Garden actually seemed concerned for the guy, and gave him a “huge, ungardenlike ovation”, when he finally got up. he acknowledged the crowd and later in an interview said how classy the Rangers fans and their organization are. That definitely stands out in my mind about JR. I say as far as personalities go, and players that have liked to speak their minds, you would have to put Hull, JR, and Avery in the same category. I am not talking about talent wise, because as much as I like Avery, he is nowhere near the talent of the other 2, but I think you all know what I mean.

    The other memory is from college when we had a draft in NHL 95 or 96 for Sega Genesis, and I won the first pick, so of course I picked JR. Let me tell you, and I am sure you all know this, the guy could NOT be stopped in that game. I don’t know if one of the makers of the game has the last name Roenick or something, but he was just a beast in the game. And I am not lying when I say, that for that entire year of college, I did not lose ONCE in that game. I was simply unbeatable. So I would like to say, thank you JR. Or, thank you game maker Yagoshi Yammimato who made the little JR the best player he could possibly be in that glorious year of the EA Sports NHL series.

    I don’t know if the game maker’s name was really Yagoshi Yammimato. But thank you to whoever made little JR such a force and a fond college memory for me.

  50. Nasty I was at that game as well…if memory serves it was a Leetch shot, and he dropped like a tree. Shattered his jaw.

  51. Grabachev in IA on

    duby will be a solid 2nd liner. i want to see him score 25 or even 30 this year. then we can start talkin captain material but until then, he is a 13 goal scorer. not a 1st line center. but id like to see artie and him challenge each other this year for the position. i think artie should earn it just like duby, and gabby may play beter with a passer like artie. we’ll see because if dru, duby, and artie are gonna be our top 3 centers it is gonna be a lot of line juggling not just because neither are good enough yet and all the new players seemingly every season are gonna have to get used to each other. im sure all 3 will play with gabby at some point this year. i know this season is gonna be frustrating at times and we may not even make the playoffs with all these young guys and besides gabby, whos gonna score 30 goals?? but it will be fun wacthing the new offensive up tempo style, and we’ll see some rookies break into the league and challenge each other which will be great for a young competitive team.

  52. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    Nasty1 , It all started in NHL93 and yes Roenick was a beast. They made him like super man or something.In Nhl95 Roenick was tamed down a bit but was still quite good still. I won a 6 week grand championship title in NHL 95 and yes Nasty1 , those were the good ‘ol days. Lets just hope Chicago pulls Roenick outta retirement for 1 year..a classy move for sure.

  53. Yeah, you are right. I totally forgot what it was that dropped him, but after I wrote my last post I called my brother and he said the same thing to me.

    Good stuff.

  54. Grabachev in IA on

    thats too funny nasty!! i remember that game too. i liked when i would play with the flames or st louis and playin with al macinnis at the point. alot of times i would shoot it and break the glass with his shot and also brett hulls. i think al iafrate was in the game too. so when i played the caps he would break the glass!!

  55. It sure did start in 93. And went all the way through to 96. He definitely did tame down a bit during those years, but he was just a consistent force.

  56. I was at that rangers flyers game when roenick took the puck to the jaw too, but of all people it was Boris Mironov who ripped that shot that broke his jaw

  57. Grabachev in IA on

    and when the super nintendo came out, they started out with a cheesy version called nhlpa hockey. i hated that one. but from 94-on especially 95 cuz it started the roster management and the create a player options. alot of fun creating funny named players and you could make them be 6’9″ 260 lbs or sometin like that. you could make them really small too like 5’6 150 lbs. the realism wasnt all there yet like i the recent nhl games, but still fun and sometimes i get nostalgic and play it from time to time. after playing nhl 09 it seems so crappy but at the time i loved it!

  58. i think vogs had a nice post earlier too about how brooks is wrong about what he said in his article

    About the centers, yea we dont have a guy who stands out as our top line center, but if you took our top 3 centers they are pretty balanced, I agree with some others about AA getting a shot on the first line if he has a real good camp, which we are all hoping for, and that leaves dubi/drury as 2nd and 3rd line centers, either one is a better than average 3rd line center offensively i woudl like to think, and dubi and drury are both tremendous at faceoffs and at playing defensively responsible hockey, so I dont think we are in as bad shape as everyone is thinking, though yes we could be in better shape if we had a top line center, i still think we can make due with what we have

  59. Gaborik will break Jagr’s goal record this year. Mark my words and bookmark this thread, because I’ll be right.

  60. I really hope Z signs in the western conference. He’s gonna play with a vengeance whenever we have to face him.

  61. In baseball, a player is considered a veteran with eight years service. Can’t say in the other sports, most football players don’t last eight years, anyway.

  62. just be confident that gaborik is going to stay healthy and score 40-50 instead of bein negative, is it that hard? or does every ranger fan haaave to have the “well with oooour luck, he will get hurt in the 5th game of the season” attitude.

  63. i think brooks was right because while the rangers again look good on paper, they still have weaknesses that were not addressed, mainly a pp qb, a tough defensive defenseman and possibly secondary scoring (though hopefully higgins provides this if allowed to play on one of the top 2 lines)

    kotalik wasn’t replacing either sjostrom or korpedo, based on his contract he is zherdev’s replacement and while i am happy zherdev is gone, i can’t say I am happy paying a player that is just as lazy/inconsistent but with less skil 3M for the next 3 years.

    gaborik replaces gomez which could be a huge upgrade if he can finally stay healthy, a big if unfortunately.

    finally it will be interesting to see what dubinsky signs for, i think he will want at the least what callahan got for 2 years or a one year deal and then we have to go through this again next year when we have staal and girardi to resign. dubinsky in his two years has put up bigger offensive numbers than cally has in his 3 seasons (tho first season was not full by any means). cally may play with more of an edge on a regular basis, but if you are brandon dubinsky and his agent would you really think callahan is worth more than you or is more important to the team than you. despite his success last year, cally is a fringe 2nd liner/solid 3rd liner while Dubinsky is currently our first line center and prob a good 2nd line center of the future

  64. Doodie Machetto on

    I hope that Gaborik stays healthy and breaks all of the scoring records on the books.

    That said, I think he is the worst kind of player for Torts: a guy with nagging hip/groin injuries. Yeah, yeah, he got surgery. It’s untested. We’ll see how everything holds up to 22+ mins of ice/night.

    For our sake, it better.

  65. Speed Ranger on

    Earlier today someone said: “I miss Jaromir.”

    Me too. It was unfair of me to expect greatness every time he touched the puck, but I did. I still do. I was able to catch a few KHL games on TV in Prague last fall.

  66. bull dog line on

    the Rangers have drafted two power play QB’s. let them fight it out to run the power play.
    Why do they need to keep bringing players from other organizations to fill the holes? promote from within.

  67. bull dog line on

    and please no Sangunetti is a bust. he was a rookie in the AHL, and had 50 pts.
    Schonfeld called him the most improved D prospect last year.

  68. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    Yeah , NO DOUBT!!! Gaborik is not getting hurt and is gonna score so many goals that were gonna have to order extra bulb for the goal scoring light!!!I did predict first that Gaborik will score 50 …like I said , You heard it here first !!

    First time I played any hockey on video was “pong” hockey. It looked the same as soccer but it was hockey!! Then the first ever video hockey was dumb Atari…awfull!! But when Intellivision hockey came…the video hockey world just started to evolve. “ttthumpp!!” you would check a guy and he’d be on his rear!!!!

    Mike In IA , (Grabchev) I still have your dubinsky post and I’m gonna pull it up as the season starts and you my friend will eat your words from 2 weeks ago!!! mUhahahahaaa!!

  69. Rob M
    August 6th, 2009 at 5:03 pm
    just be confident that gaborik is going to stay healthy and score 40-50 instead of bein negative, is it that hard? or does every ranger fan haaave to have the “well with oooour luck, he will get hurt in the 5th game of the season” attitude.


    Man, why did you have to be negative in that positive post? :P

  70. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    That was most certainly a negative point in a positive post that looked more positive than negative but ended up too negative and not that postitive?

  71. after surgery gaborik came back and had 10 goals and 8 assists in 11 games, and he looked fine to me when he played against us, and he played a little under 20mins per game in those 11 games after surgery

  72. Philly is interested in Bertuzzi…those flyer/ranger games are really gonna be something this year

  73. This is funny, and very similar to what I wrote earlier. From

    Adieu, pixilated legend: Jeremy Roenick was a video game god

    Thursday, August 6, 2009 | Feedback | Print Entry

    Posted by Patrick Hruby

    Twenty years. Nine NHL All-Star Game appearances. Two Olympics. A staggering 1,216 points. Brutal checks and even more brutal honesty. Taken in total, a heck of a hockey career. But none of that is the real reason I’ll mourn the retirement of Jeremy Roenick.

    No, I’ll miss Roenick marauding through “NHL ’94” like an Abrams battle tank.

    The pantheon of greatest video-game athletes generally consists of Bo Jackson from “Tecmo Super Bowl” and everybody else. This is a grave oversight. It should be Bo Jackson, Roenick and everybody else. Because while Roenick’s digital doppelganger is best misremembered for making Wayne Gretzky’s head bleed in “Swingers” — actually, it was Steve Larmer — the truth is that he was so much more: stealer of pucks, scorer of goals, fast and agile and uncheckable, a fight- and faceoff-winning Terminator sent from the future to destroy professional hockey — before it could lock out an entire season and move half its franchises to puck-loving markets such as Phoenix — one bleeding, twitching opponent at a time.

    In an era of virtual legends — preceded by Vince Coleman from “RBI Baseball” and Philadelphia QB #12 from “Madden ’92;” succeeded by Pavel Bure from “NHL ’95” and Michael Vick from “Madden 2005” — Roenick reigned supreme. No pixilated player — not even Bo — has been responsible for more dorm-room and frat-house money changing hands. He was, in short, the 16-bit answer to suspense writer Peter Benchley’s Architeuthis. The beast. Roenick could not be stopped, couldn’t be contained; the only real way to slow him down was to turn offsides and penalties “ON.” But who wants to play like that?

    Unlike many of his on-screen peers, Roenick came by his success honestly. He wasn’t godlike because of a programming glitch, à la dunk-from-the-3-point-line Tom Chambers in “Lakers vs. Celtics.” He didn’t thrive because of high ratings in a couple of categories that were overvalued by his particular game (Bure’s speed, Vick’s speed and arm strength). He lacked the ginned-up, CPU-controlled, can’t-press-a-button-that-fast abilities of Mike Tyson in “Punch-Out!” Roenick wasn’t even the highest-rated player in his game. He was simply an all-around stud without a weakness. Without peer. He could flatten an opposing winger with a head-on open-ice crosscheck, seize the puck in the same motion, outskate defenders the other way and blast a fake-middle, shoot-post wrister past the goalie with the same ease with which he won fights. What more could a gamer ask for?

    Oh, and the great Tecmo Bo? Only played one way.

    Double-Down Trent from “Swingers” was right. It was never about us, always about Roenick. He really was that good. And so, I bid him adieu. As long as there are Sega Genesis emulators — note: these might be illegal; I’m speaking in a purely theoretical sense — he will never be forgotten.

    NHL, Jeremy Roenick

    ESPN Conversation

    3 comments on “Adieu, pixilated legend: Jeremy Roenick was a video game god”

    * NHL

  74. Carp….any chance we get a short at Horton from the panthers…His cap hit is 4 mill….But his salary goes from 4 this yr to 5.5 for the next 2……

  75. Carp, I was wondering if you could let all of us know who exactly the Rangers may still be looking at as upgrades going into next season. I keep hearing rumblings of a bunch of players here and there but its difficult to decipher whats the truth and whats Eklund =p I have heard Heatley(obviously), Richards, Babchuk, Schneider and Seidenberg. Am I missing anyone and what would you put the chances of bringing anoher player in before camp are? Thanks for the help, and by the way, love the blog, thanks for keeping it going!

  76. I hated the fact that jagr broke gravey’s record, I wish gravey could have held that one forever!! I certainly do not miss jagr (i know I’m in the minority here). Where did someone see the bertuzzi to philly rumor?????

  77. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    Tecmo Bowl was awsome and yes yer right , Bo Jackson was the best in it!!!

    Jeremy Roenick never won a Stanley Cup but yeah in his video game debut , he won plenty of cups …plenty!!
    JR for Commish , he’d be wayyy better than Buttman.

  78. carp,

    if you are doing all that research for others please look in to the gauthier possiblility for me.

  79. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    wickey , It was a record that should never have been. 50 goals by only Hatfield? Guys like Bure and Gartner should have done it and for Graves to hit 52 was a long time comming. Jagr breaking it was awsome and just you wait…Gaborik will break Jagrs. My how things have changed , sweet!!

  80. No Country For Old Rangers on

    i hate the espn “insider” bs.

    espn is to hockey as coldplay is to rock and roll

  81. No Country For Old Rangers on

    and keep smoking and pass it this way if you think gabby is gonna break JJ’s record this year.

  82. Can I just reiterate my disbelief that the Rangers let go of the best PK team in the league?

  83. I have a better feeling about Gaborik than I do Jagr. Jagr was world class talent, but he was past his prime. Gaborik is just entering it.. let’s hope NY doctors are as good as they’ve been. Oh, and Jim Ramsey!!!!!!!!!

  84. Grabachev in IA on

    holy crap i was just makin a joke. i dont really expect gabby to get hurt real bad again. i saw the guy say” he will break jagrs goal record” and just made a simple joke. relax people.

    greg- i like duby . hes a great player. im just sayin hes not a 1st liner. not yet anyway. we could see him take this opurtunity and become the ranger version of jeff carter or some equal talent. he most certainly is a top 6 guy on the team as it stands now. i am just saying, that he better score more than 13 goals and in 2 seasons he hasnt done that yet. ok 14 his first season. i consider this a very important time in his career..he has a real chance to shine and torts has a lot of confidence in him which means hes gonna get alot of icetime and valuable minutes. now i also realize that he started off very well last season along with voros and zherdev. those 3 were the heart of the team for the first few weeks. i think he learned alot last year going through his slumps and changing coaches so given a full year under torts he should do well. ok greg. see, im a duby fan too!

  85. Grabachev in IA on

    pavel has a point. if gabby stays healthy and has a good set up man to feed him pucks(maybe artie?) i think he does have a shot. hes in his prime too. but i will just fine if he plays all season with no major injuries while getting 35-40 goals at least. anything more than 45 and he will already have more than any single season in minny i believe. just stay healthy gabs!!! i have faith jim ramsay!!

  86. Rodney Dangerfield on

    I heard Hugh Jessiman stole 14 gallons of nesquick from a local shopping center.

  87. I forgot who thought we screwed the best PK in the league by not re-signing Sjo and Betts, but I don’t share the dread.

    The biggest part of the best PK in the league is still here. Henrik.

    Higgins is a great penalty killer. Gaborik is a great PK’er.

    Dubinsky and Callahan were also part of that great PK. you cant do it with two forwards. Come on.

    The PK takes two lines and a great goalie. We replaced betts and sjostraom sith Higgins and Gaborik ( I am guessing). Our penalty kill will be just as good, if not better, next year.

    If Betts was so important, how come nobody has even made him a measly offer? Most of what he did was not talent related, it was heart and greast sacrifice. He did show a lot of heart but he can be replaced.

    Our PK is the least of our worries going into next year

  88. Depressing stat of the day

    Rozy 76 games played 5 mil salary 90 hits(and I question most of those).

    Orpik 79 games played 3.75 mil salary 309….309 hits.

    SAD, so very SAD!!!!! Those three extra games must have been the difference for those other 219 hits!!!!

  89. If Betts was so important, how come nobody has even made him a measly offer?


    I’m willing to bet Betts’ injury (thanks to Brashear) was career ending. We all know that Betts can’t hit the net for shiat, but the guy gives 200% EVERY shift. He blocks EVERYTHING. He is the perfect teammate. If he was healthy, any team would be interested, period.

  90. It could be legit if, and only if, Rozsival is a part of it. As much as I like Richards, he is a $7.8m cap hit. This team is going for cap suicide if they want to re-sign Staal and Girardi with Richards’ salary on the books.

    Sather is too unrealistic. Dolan just wants a f’n playoff series. I say give Dubi one year with Gaborik. He flourished under Torts. Why waste cap space when we know we’re not going to win the damn cup.

  91. I don’t i love the way Dubi plays but if he thinks he deserves more than what Cali got thats a ridiculous.

  92. My bad with the typos thats what i get for playin NHL and typin at the same time. LOL

  93. Wicky229
    August 6th, 2009 at 8:45 pm

    I’m fine if gabby breaks it. I’d rather have him hold it than jagr.


    what is your problem with Jagr? wtf did he do to you? didnt mow your lawn on time or something?

  94. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    Richards!!???? Pukeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!Bla!!! for dubi dubi doo!!!!!!??? what is going on here!!!

    Yeah cool name mike , ill get one soon ..just gimme some time.

    Was cwatti right all along about Richards!!!?…tune in next week and you’ll hear nurse piggy say…

  95. CCCP

    Jagr was a great player in the NHL and I am not denying that, I am just not a fan of the dipsy dooo, east west style players. I also thought he was a very poor captain for the rangers (for what it is worth I thought leetch was also a very poor captain for the rangers, a great great player, but a poor captain). Graves hit, fought, stood up for his teammates, did what ever was asked of him for the good of his teammates, that is why I wanted him to have the record for the rangers forever. I would rather gabby have it because he plays a north south game and I just enjoy that style of play more (that being said if jagr called and asked if I wanted to meet him for drinks, I would. He is a very funny dude, that being said so is Gomer).

  96. BTW, If it really is a richards deal, they better make it redden instead of rozy for there to be any smidge of cap space left at all.

  97. Hockey Rumor Mill Volume16 can go to hell. If we trade Dubinksy away just so that we can get rid of Rozsivals salary and get Brad Richards back I will kill somebody. I rather be okay for the next few years and be better in the future instead of trading away youth, this is ridiculous if this article is true. I dont understand why in a few years this team cant be successful with Gaborik, Dubi, Cally, Anisimov, Grachev, Higgins, Lisin, Staal, Girardi, Del Zotto, Gilroy, Sanguinetti, McDonaugh, Lundqvist after some of the younger talent develops. Screw getting another overpaid star on his way down, even though Brad Richards can be a great player I just dont know why he has to give away the future, give Dubi comparable money as to waht Cally got and lets start 09-10, its simple

  98. Hockey rumor mill is just that – its churning out rumors made on blogs rather than with any substance. We’d be committing cap suicide to take on Richards contract, let alone losing another veteran D-man without replacing him.
    I appreciate that at this exact point Richards is an upgrade over Dubinsky but we could look back in 2 years time having lost Richards to free agency to see Dubinksy centering Dallas’ top line for less than half the money.

    Dubinsky doesn’t have much leverage unless his agent can unearth an offer sheet from somewhere and he’s not arbitration eligible until next year so he may end up playing for his qualifying offer this year and arbitration next year. I imagine Slats has at least a 2 year $1.75m per year deal on the table for him, if not then i’d say he was low-balling him.

    I think Gaborik is a more exciting player than Jagr due to his speed, explosiveness and age – he needs a center who can transport the puck and a d-man who can make the 2-line passes to set him free – we’ll see who they are in camp.

  99. ZzZz Greg L. ZzZz on

    Jagr’s east west style won us a ton of games and got Jarda 54 goals~!!!! East-west style is far from boring and to race back n forth with the North south …It is as boring as it gets !! watch speed skating if ya want North south wicky!!

  100. with Boston being unable to resign Kessel, I wonder if the Rangers are interested in trading for him.

    it would have to be something like Dubinsky, Voros (salary dump), McDonagh and a 1st round pick.

    Normally I wouldn’t want to trade our future but Kessel is a year younger than Dubi and had 36 goals in 70 games last season. He’d be our #1 center for years to come…

  101. cwgatti

    idk considering its your fantasyland you can make him whatever number you want!!!

  102. Listen, I am not necessarily in favor of bringing Richards here. I am reporting what I BELIEVE will happen. Dubinsky is overrated, but considering the salary cap I would prefer him to Richards. Slats loaded up on prospects for a reason. . . .

  103. well if you can ignore the salary cap surely you can ignore the retired numbers too, no?

  104. In fact I was clamoring for Dubinsky to be traded last summer when his value was sky high. But when Slats traded for Z, I thought that would help our scoring woes. I hate to hear how Jagr was so lousy his last season here. He played with Dubi. He may as well have been wearing one skate. Dubi played well for an unpolished kid with a ton of heart, but he wasn’t nearly as good as Ranger fans made him out to be.

    Dubi is good. Not great.

  105. oleosmirf,
    I am just telling you what I believe will happen. It may not happen. I could be wrong. . . not very often, but I could be. Maybe a well connected little birdie told me all about it? Maybe I pulled it out of my. . . .
    If you know Slats. And you know Torts. And you understand how MSG thinks. It all makes a lot of sense.
    And if deep down YOU didn’t believe it too, would you be replying to my nonsense posts?!

  106. no because you keep posting the same garbage when it is not even possible according to the rules of the salary cap.

    if Richards was going to be a UFA after this season then yes it would make perfect sense but considering the cap problems we are going to have next offseason, adding 7.8 mil of additional cap space is completely nuts…

  107. Unless James Neal, or Fabian Brunnstrom is involved in the deal. Then it would definitely be considered. But Oleo is right, we made an unbelievable move by getting rid of Blowmez huge contract, and signed Gabby with the extra cash, so getting Richards will be pretty equal to that.

    I wish it was fuggin september !

  108. Gravey - Formerly known as Jor71 on

    I agree about Dubi being over-rated, at this time. I really do not understand how a lot of people think he is the next great one and should be untouchable. I think if it makes sense and it will help the team, trade him.

    Maybe he will turn out to be a superstar, but he is not right now.

  109. Gravey - Formerly known as Jor71 on

    Orr, I agree with you about trading him for Heatley and not Richards.

    As I said, trade Dubi if it makes sense.

  110. If last year was Dubinsky’s sophmore slump, I think Sather would be a fool to trade him at this point in his career…but, hey, Sather might lapse into old habits.

    Dubi has a nice puck control game in the offensive zone, which fits into Torts’ system. He also is learning the ropes still, has shown flashes of brilliance and has a nose for the net. He isn’t afraid to mix it up with opponents or stand up for his teammates…if Glenn finds adopts a #1 from the outside, Dubi will be a valuable #2-3 for years to come with the potential to be #1.

    Interesting how Ranger fans are enticed by the prospect of easy upgrades that magically will develop chemistry with the existing squad, if the money is right…that’s what Glenn’s been doing since he became GM.

    I am interested to see if Sather can stick to his promise to develop the organization’s young talent. That’s crucial to improving the team. Look at the Devils’ success!

  111. wildplaces

    i definately agree. just compare this year’s team to last year’s team and were already much better than last season plus we have vastly improved our farm system as well. besides a veteran 7th defenseman and maybe Betts (prob not though) we are pretty much set

    Opening Game Lineup 08-09



    Possible Opening Game Lineup 09-10



  112. Grabachev in IA on

    what i dont get, is why would we trade gomez if we were just gonna overpay even more for richards? similar stats last year, actually i think gomez had more points. gomez wouldve been perfect to play with gabby. i realy cant stand that gomez(who actually had some redeeming qualities) had to go, and dru stayed. if we couldve traded him instead, we wouldnt have to be looking for number 1 center. duby could center the 2nd line and artie the 3rd.
    oh and rozy isnt going anywhere. i had a prophetic dream last night and the first game of the season we will win 2-1 off goals by gabby and rozy. we’ll be tied 1-1 late in the 3rd and rozy will score to win it. actually, i dont know if its the first game of teh season but he will be here this season trust me. wait, hold on, im having a vision!! it wasnt rozy who scores the goal, it was richards!!! i had it wrong. our hero richards!!!!!!! yea!!!1 thank you glen for giving us another 15 goal scoring 8 million dolla player

  113. Grabachev in IA on

    oleo- avery on the top line? well, i can see the logic behind that. he can be a distraction for gabby and he also has speed which will help him keep up with gabby and him and duby can work the corners and behind the net while gabby sets up in front. good idea. but we may need a little more skill up front. even though i loved watchin duby, avery, and antro in game 7 last playoffs, they couldnt generate enough chances. gabby will help that, but i want him to have a set up man. hopefyully duby can be that and him and gabby should start practicing his passing and rushes . maybe artie fills that void. i dont see that happening just yet though. in time yea.

  114. Joe in DE (the real one) on

    Agreed about NO to Richards. Unless we get MIKE Richards, or resurrect MAURICE RICHARD, there should be no Richards in a NYR sweater this year.

    The NYR syndrome strikes Richards, good player, just not good enough for his salary. We already have a bunch of those. Dubi was Jagr’s preferred centerman, let’s see what develops with Gabby. If we keep a little cap room, we can always make a deal at the deadline. Let’s see if it’s really broke before we try to fix it

  115. Mike in IA

    regardless of what Tortorella decides on lines or personel my point is that the Rangers (even with 4+ rookies and no #1 center) are still in a much better position than the team we had to start the year last season…

  116. Ther R A Possible 5 or 6 #1 or #2 Centerts Availeable…
    Marleau,Boston… Sturm ,Kessel or Bergeron,Richards …
    Edmeton has 4 Cogs,Gagne ,o sullivan..all young…Maybe Horton Cause of His Escalating Salary…4 Mil this yr…5.5 next2 …Duby is overated but I would not trade him for an older center…A Younger Pure Center ….Yes….He Is A Tweener….

  117. THERE IS NO WAY WE CAN FIT RICHARDS OR HEATLEY (although he is slightly easier to manage cap-wise) ON THIS TEAM!!!

    If they get either guy,it weakens our entire team: No Rozy, No Gilroy, and we would have to play 5-6 rookies next season with 780k of cap space all year

    Brad Richards — $7,800,000
    Marian Gaborik — $7,500,000
    Chris Drury — $7,050,000
    Ales Kotalik — $3,000,000
    Ryan Callahan — $2,300,000
    Chris Higgins — $2,250,000
    Sean Avery — $1,937,500
    Donald Brashear — $1,400,000
    Artem Anisimov — $821,666
    Enver Lisin — $790,000
    Tyler Arnason — $700,000
    Brian Boyle — $525,000
    Dane Byers — $500,000
    Wade Redden — $6,500,000
    Daniel Girardi — $1,550,000
    Ilkka Heikkinen — $875,000
    Bobby Sanguinetti — $855,000
    Mike Sauer – $846,666
    Marc Staal — $826,666
    Corey Potter — $550,000
    Henrik Lundqvist — $6,875,000
    Steve Valiquette — $725,000

    SALARY CAP $56,800,000
    PAYROLL $56,177,498
    BONUSES $165,000
    CAP SPACE $787,502

  118. Guys,
    Here is my feelings on Dubinski, and why he shouldn’t be included in any deal.
    Every team needs heart and soul players who leave it all on the ice and lead…something we were unfamiliar with until Dubinski and Callahan along. IMO you don’t trade these players unless you have lots of them. I didn’t see Gomez, Redden, Rozi, Drury, etc etc etc doing that. So also IMO they are the core of this team, not Drury or even Hank…Dubi and Cally. If they stay in NY, they will be our Captains/leaders for years. The team will be built around them. Also both of them ARE Torts type players, high energy, scrappy, quick players, they fit right into Torts style of play.
    I say keep them…I want youth, I want to build this team from the inside and fill in gaps with trades/signings. This way you start a tradition/movement like we see in other organizations…ie Detroit, the Debbies and even Chicago to some extent.

  119. Question guys …

    Would would you want more (if we HAD to trade for one of them)??

    Nylander @ 4.8 mill (2 more years)- Having to only trade Rozy to clear space

    B. Richards @ 7.8 mill (2 more years) – having to trade Rozy, Dubi, and possibly not play Gilroy due to cap constraints

  120. Carp a question….If a player has a de escalating salary…and a higher cap hit….say cap hit of 7 and salary of 5…..and u buy him out over 3 yrs….what would the effect be??? would it be the salary number or Cap number??

  121. LET’S GO RANGERS!!!!!!!!!!
    Today is my birthday and the day I start to think about holding the Cup in my arms a few months down the road. I have lived another year and the Rangers have another chance to start fresh and give me my Cup.
    Thanks to R.Carp and everyone for a great summer of browsing this board while I bask in the ocean breeze at the beach and on the CG vessels.
    Now Let’s get down to business!!!

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